Not worth reading

Just needed a place to vent and spout my self pity and since no one here knows my name or anything, this gives me a chance to say what I want without it biting me in the ass. Been having a lousy time at work recently, been accused of making my work a hostile work environment. I'm suppose to be the manager of a small engine shop, but the owner is there most of the time, so I have a bunch of footprints on top of my head from the employees stepping all over me to complain to him about how big a piece of shit I am, how lazy I am, what a huge liar I am, and how much they hate me. I've been told by the owner and his dad both that they like me. Nice. Whoopty fucking doo. They tell me that I need to be more responsible and I need to dole work out, but when I try, no go, and I end up having to do it myself because I have to be a fucking babysitter and hold peoples hand to get anything done. Had a two month review last week, and they tell me what the hell I'm doing wrong, then today, the owners son tells me that it might be in my best interest to look for other employment. Seems like all I am is one huge fuck up, and I swear that there are a lot of times, like right now, that I feel that the world would be a better place if I wasn't in it. On my way home from work today, thought about just swerving in front of a 18 wheeler and slamming on brakes and let them just run me the fuck over, but then I thought about what the driver would have to go through and I couldn't do that to someone. I don't want to hurt anyone, but I'm sick of hurting myself. Feel like my marriage is in shambles, feel like my wife married me just because she couldn't do any better, maybe I married her for that very reason. Just want to curl up in a little ball and cry right now. Seems like I can't make friends with people, can't keep a job, can't ever catch up on finances, for example, just found out that one of my former employers who was paying me in cash under the table turned in my taxes for the year I was with him, now I owe almost a thousand dollars to the state in taxes, and I hate to thing of what I'm gonna owe in federal taxes. Yeah, I know, that's my fuck up though, should have paid taxes on my income. Guess I can't do anything but fuck up, and I'm tired of living. Just want it all to end. Think I'm gonna go take some of my wife's pain pills and go to sl**p, hopefully forever. What a fucked up October 27th...